Harbor Profile: Professor Zhi-Jun Ni
The math professor shares his life and jokes
Peggy Bacon
Posted in: News on 12/13/07 at 1:40 PM PST
TEACHER: Let me see -- the Final won't have the word "SAMPLE" on it. That's about it.
STUDENT: Everything that will be on the Final is already on the sample Final, right?
TEACHER: Right. Everything that is already on the sample Final will be on the Final.
STUDENT: Tell me how much you will twist the sample Final on the Final, then I will know how hard I need to study.
TEACHER: Define "twist" for me.
STUDENT: The Final won't be difficult, right?
TEACHER: Sorry, can you say that again? Are you making a comment on my good look?
STUDENT: (Upon Seeing the sample test) Oh, my god. I'm going to FAIL!
TEACHER: No, you are NOT going to fail. You are going to panic, you are going to study, and then you are going to enjoy holidays.
STUDENT: I can't fail this class!
TEACHER: Is it because of the shame, the guilt, or the disgrace?
STUDENT: I can not fail -- I laugh at your jokes!
TEACHER: And I laugh at you, so we are even now.
STUDENT: I will remember your jokes.
TEACHER: And you will forget math, right? I tell you my jokes are trash.
STUDENT: Mr. Ni, I told my friend you are funny. She will take your class next semester.
TEACHER: Did you tell your friend it's going to be a math class?
STUDENT: Math is holding my life back!
TEACHER: You are -- Actually Math is leading you to your future.
STUDENT: Mr. Ni, I'm a student reporter as well. Can you please write down some of your jokes?
TEACHER: Wow! What? A dedicated student like you are saying your class notes are incomplete?
STUDENT: How is your daughter?
TEACHER: I'm shaking already. She is back tonight from a week-long science camp. And the hamster is going to complain.
STUDENT: Mr. Ni, what do you want me to put on the evaluation form?
TEACHER: Just be honest, say Mr. Ni is the best math teacher, ever, in history.
STUDENT: If you promise to give me an A, I promise I will write "EXCELLENT" on the evaluation.
STUDENT: Everything that will be on the Final is already on the sample Final, right?
TEACHER: Right. Everything that is already on the sample Final will be on the Final.
STUDENT: Tell me how much you will twist the sample Final on the Final, then I will know how hard I need to study.
TEACHER: Define "twist" for me.
STUDENT: The Final won't be difficult, right?
TEACHER: Sorry, can you say that again? Are you making a comment on my good look?
STUDENT: (Upon Seeing the sample test) Oh, my god. I'm going to FAIL!
TEACHER: No, you are NOT going to fail. You are going to panic, you are going to study, and then you are going to enjoy holidays.
STUDENT: I can't fail this class!
TEACHER: Is it because of the shame, the guilt, or the disgrace?
STUDENT: I can not fail -- I laugh at your jokes!
TEACHER: And I laugh at you, so we are even now.
STUDENT: I will remember your jokes.
TEACHER: And you will forget math, right? I tell you my jokes are trash.
STUDENT: Mr. Ni, I told my friend you are funny. She will take your class next semester.
TEACHER: Did you tell your friend it's going to be a math class?
STUDENT: Math is holding my life back!
TEACHER: You are -- Actually Math is leading you to your future.
STUDENT: Mr. Ni, I'm a student reporter as well. Can you please write down some of your jokes?
TEACHER: Wow! What? A dedicated student like you are saying your class notes are incomplete?
STUDENT: How is your daughter?
TEACHER: I'm shaking already. She is back tonight from a week-long science camp. And the hamster is going to complain.
STUDENT: Mr. Ni, what do you want me to put on the evaluation form?
TEACHER: Just be honest, say Mr. Ni is the best math teacher, ever, in history.
STUDENT: If you promise to give me an A, I promise I will write "EXCELLENT" on the evaluation.
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